If you’re doing it right, your search for a new home should take you through neighborhoods you probably never visited before. If the very thought of the ground you’ll be covering exhausts you, just be glad you’ll be slogging your way through a city as rich in sounds and sights as New York.
Depending on the neighborhood, you’re likely to hear a wide array of accented English. Keep an ear out for the homegrown variety. You never know, you just might find your dream apartment in a neighborhood where everyone speaks the same musically lilting version of Brooklynese that Bugs Bunny made famous throughout the English-speaking world. Follow the link beneath this map that was published in amNew York for an acoustical tour of neighborhoods’ dialects. Wordorigin.org offers a brief survival guide for the local lingo that's definitely worth a quick scroll through. If you're dying for caffeine, knowing how to order a "regular" coffee anywhere outside of a chain store, might just save your life.
And why not make your travels even more interesting with a scavenger hunt for public art? has long been known to nurture the talents of artistic outlaws deep within its dark underbelly. Although you're unlikely to ever see them plying their trade--unless you, yourself are up to no good--shadowy graffiti artists' signature pieces can be spotted throughout the city. Sure, “artist” doesn’t apply to the vast majority of narcissistic jerks who scratch up subway windows or tag surface imaginable, but some have generated a fan base and even parlayed their property crimes into professional art careers. Gridskipper has published a field guide to some of New York’s best known guerrilla scribblers dodging the law today.
Mar 3, 2008
Mar 2, 2008
How To Talk Dirty To A New Yorker
Despite the uncertainty in the real estate market elsewhere in the country, the New York Post reports that a number of buildings in NYC are offering perky perks and sweet, sweet swag to tempt potential buyers to indulge.
Some buildings allow buyers to charge their down payments on their American Express cards, which can translate into all sorts of goodies through reward points. Said one flushed and giddy buyer:
$1000. Giftcard to Saks: priceless
Real estate developers are also getting into the pot-sweetening game. All you have to add is the throaty whisper.
Some buildings allow buyers to charge their down payments on their American Express cards, which can translate into all sorts of goodies through reward points. Said one flushed and giddy buyer:
"[It] was quite shocking… When I was getting ready to write out the check, I was just joking around and said, 'Can I put this on my card?' They said yes. It worked out to a $1,000 gift certificate at Saks."Down payment on a 0ne-bedroom in Mid-Town: $90,000.
$1000. Giftcard to Saks: priceless
Real estate developers are also getting into the pot-sweetening game. All you have to add is the throaty whisper.
Buildings are picking up closing costs. Or they have on-site mortgage brokers who will instantly approve you for a mortgage - and shave points off your rate. A few require just 5 percent down. Some are throwing in a washer/dryer or a parking space.Hmmm… So after all this romance will there be the real estate equivalent of a Crying Game-type surprise like, say, no bathroom? Nope. But, according to one developer, the sweet talk might be the seller’s tactic to move things along:
"[I]t's new developments that are priced a little higher than they should be, or the developer wants to get rid of the last few units. You get concessions not from the beginning, not when they first start up - it's when they want to get the business wrapped up.”Don’t worry. That doesn’t mean it wasn’t as good for them as it was you.
“It’s more than just fluff.”
Things Get Harry at #1 Morton Square
Residents of the most fashionable, high-end NYC apartments have made an art of being unimpressed by the celebrities next door, even when the inevitable hijinks ensue.
After all, enduring the deranged shrieking of a high-profile nervous breakdown or stepping over the burnt-out candle stubs and puckered photographs of an impromptu shrine are minor inconveniences when compared to the sharp increase in real estate value that inevitably befalls a building brushed with greatness[NYM].
But what can residents of #1 Morton Square expect when young Daniel Radcliff moves into his $4.9 million, three-bedroom corner digs [NYT]?
Best known for his role as Harry Potter in the enormously popular movie franchise, some news sources are playfully speculating whether Mr. Radcliff’s new neighbors will have to steel their nerves for an influx of mythical beasts and otherworldly creatures--but that’s just silly, of course. With Amy Poehler and the Olson twins already living in the building, residents of #1 Morton Square have been dealing with an elf problem for a while now.
After all, enduring the deranged shrieking of a high-profile nervous breakdown or stepping over the burnt-out candle stubs and puckered photographs of an impromptu shrine are minor inconveniences when compared to the sharp increase in real estate value that inevitably befalls a building brushed with greatness[NYM].
But what can residents of #1 Morton Square expect when young Daniel Radcliff moves into his $4.9 million, three-bedroom corner digs [NYT]?
Best known for his role as Harry Potter in the enormously popular movie franchise, some news sources are playfully speculating whether Mr. Radcliff’s new neighbors will have to steel their nerves for an influx of mythical beasts and otherworldly creatures--but that’s just silly, of course. With Amy Poehler and the Olson twins already living in the building, residents of #1 Morton Square have been dealing with an elf problem for a while now.
Mar 1, 2008
WEEK LINX: Bones, Guts, and Funny Smells
Bone Homes [TV]
Exclusive photo of the two human femurs uncovered last month that brought the Washington Square Park renovations to a bone-grinding halt.
Home Bones [NYM]
Last year, New York Magazine published these shots of NYC apartments and spaces, true diamonds-in-the-rough. Totally worth another look--just the beautiful tonic for anyone battling real estate fatigue.
No Guts, No Glory! [NYP]
Squeamish? Then maybe a gut reno apartment isn't for you, you big baby.
That Maple Smell of Mystery and Intrigue [NY1]
Reports of the not unpleasant (yet still somehow disconcerting) maple-syrup-odor-of unknown-origin's return have been flooding 311 and 911 for the first time since it mysteriously came and went in 2005.
El Ginko Es El Stinko [NYT]
These trees have a long and proud history that dates back thousands of years before they began stinking up NYC neighborhoods.
Mmm... Horsey! [Sun]
Construction will soon begin on the conversion of the historic Claremont Riding Academy into nine luxury apartments. Many of the original fixtures will be saved, but not the interior wood structures that are unlikely to ever part with their horsey fragrance.
Exclusive photo of the two human femurs uncovered last month that brought the Washington Square Park renovations to a bone-grinding halt.
Home Bones [NYM]
Last year, New York Magazine published these shots of NYC apartments and spaces, true diamonds-in-the-rough. Totally worth another look--just the beautiful tonic for anyone battling real estate fatigue.
No Guts, No Glory! [NYP]
Squeamish? Then maybe a gut reno apartment isn't for you, you big baby.
That Maple Smell of Mystery and Intrigue [NY1]
Reports of the not unpleasant (yet still somehow disconcerting) maple-syrup-odor-of unknown-origin's return have been flooding 311 and 911 for the first time since it mysteriously came and went in 2005.
El Ginko Es El Stinko [NYT]
These trees have a long and proud history that dates back thousands of years before they began stinking up NYC neighborhoods.
Mmm... Horsey! [Sun]
Construction will soon begin on the conversion of the historic Claremont Riding Academy into nine luxury apartments. Many of the original fixtures will be saved, but not the interior wood structures that are unlikely to ever part with their horsey fragrance.
Beauty Pageant Carpetbagger Boosts "Miss Brooklyn"
Sorry, Leigh-Taylor Smith, aka "Miss Brooklyn" 2008, but there is no NYC neighborhood or borough called “Whateversville” in the middle of the East River, you either live in Brooklyn, or you don't—and you don't. Ms. Smith tells the Daily News:
In all fairness to Ms. Smith, Virginia is Pageant Country and the competition can be brutal. Relocation to a city that—outside of the drag queen community—has little interest in beauty pageants may be her only shot at eventually clawing her way up to Miss America.
Dear Ms. Smith:
You are new here. That you’ve already put yourself in front of the people of Brooklyn to fulfill your ambitions to leave, is exactly why you do not want the people of Brooklyn anywhere behind you right now…
Margot Agostini from Prospect Heights, who won't be Miss Brooklyn this year, probably spoke many New Yorkers' minds when she told the Daily News:
Miss Brooklyn Linx:
Note what's listed under her picture after Talent:
Pageant "Swag"
“I’m only one stop away [from Brooklyn]…”NYC Geography 101: "One stop away from Brooklyn" is not Brooklyn. It is one stop away from Brooklyn. In Ms. Smith’s case, this would be Manhattan. But then she’d know that if she didn’t just move to NYC from Virginia.
"I'm still thrilled to represent Brooklyn and I hope to represent it well."Hopefully, Ms. Smith will “represent Brooklyn” in the NYC sense of "to represent" one's home: roughly translated, to honor or embody its spirit with loyalty and affection. That would mean better than she “represented” Hampton-Newport News in 2006 and Arlington in 2007. Not because she lost both years' bids for Miss Virginia, but because no sooner had her term as Miss Arlington 2007 run out, then she packed up her carpetbags and moved to NYC—just in time for the first Miss Brooklyn pageant since 1991. May the area of her Manhattan studio apartment be surpassed only by the depth of her allegiance.
In all fairness to Ms. Smith, Virginia is Pageant Country and the competition can be brutal. Relocation to a city that—outside of the drag queen community—has little interest in beauty pageants may be her only shot at eventually clawing her way up to Miss America.
"Hopefully, the people of Brooklyn can get behind me. Maybe we'll be making the trip to Miss America in Vegas. It would be fantastic."
Dear Ms. Smith:
You are new here. That you’ve already put yourself in front of the people of Brooklyn to fulfill your ambitions to leave, is exactly why you do not want the people of Brooklyn anywhere behind you right now…
Margot Agostini from Prospect Heights, who won't be Miss Brooklyn this year, probably spoke many New Yorkers' minds when she told the Daily News:
“She’s still a tourist. Brooklyn is full of beautiful women."But perhaps Jestina Cumberbatch of Bedford-Stuyvesant, who also won’t be Miss Brooklyn this year, spoke most Brooklynites' hearts:
"[The judges] weren't looking hard enough, otherwise they would've found me."
Miss Brooklyn Linx:
Note what's listed under her picture after Talent:
Pageant "Swag"
Parker Doesn't Pose Here Anymore
Unelected, but somehow anointed “East Village Mascot,” Parker Posey, just traded in her final shred of bohemian street cred when she sold her 1845 brownstone on East 10th Street and purchased a “big girl”, one-bedroom co-op on Fifth Avenue.
Ms. Posey’s relocation, might confirm some observers’ belief that—despite her prolific career in low-budget, independent films in the early- and mid-nineties—at best, she was only ever a sanitized, Hollywood version of an East Village hipster. But then again, some other purists might contend, isn’t the East Village itself—like so many other NYC neighborhoods—becoming a more sanitized, Hollywood version of itself?
Not as long as Chloë Sevigny lives there. No amount of Hollywood scrubbing will ever fade the indelible smudge her role in The Brown Bunny left on her resume (and Vincent Gallo's 501s), but those are the career faux-pas that will guarantee Ms. Sevigny East Village citizenship for life.
Ms. Posey’s relocation, might confirm some observers’ belief that—despite her prolific career in low-budget, independent films in the early- and mid-nineties—at best, she was only ever a sanitized, Hollywood version of an East Village hipster. But then again, some other purists might contend, isn’t the East Village itself—like so many other NYC neighborhoods—becoming a more sanitized, Hollywood version of itself?
Not as long as Chloë Sevigny lives there. No amount of Hollywood scrubbing will ever fade the indelible smudge her role in The Brown Bunny left on her resume (and Vincent Gallo's 501s), but those are the career faux-pas that will guarantee Ms. Sevigny East Village citizenship for life.
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